Tuesday, October 30, 2007

A Series: Fall in Lower Alabama!

The Making of a Jack-o-Lantern

In Lower Alabama, Fall does not necessarily mean cooler weather. In fact, it usually does NOT. Case and point: our trip to the pumpkin patch. It took place on October 17th, a date that in most parts of the country would have cool breezes...a little nip in the air...a promise of cold weather to come. Not so here. While we had a really fun time taking the hayride out to the pumpkin patch, listening to a presentation on how pumpkins grow and choosing which two pumpkins we wanted to take home, it was all somehow dampened by the amount of sweat running down my back!

All of that aside, here are the steps to making a jack-o-lantern:

1. Pick out the two biggest pumpkins in the patch so your mom will have so much fun carrying them both back to the car. I mean, what's more fun than watching mom's arms turn to jelly from the weight of the pumpkins! (Truth be told, it was my idea to pick big ones so we could make jack-o-lanterns. I was seriously rethinking my words as I carried them to the car.)

(Do you notice how green everything is in the pic above? No changing leaves here)

2. Choose the most complicated template you can find. After all anything fun has to be extremely complicated, right? About two years ago, one of my sisters-in-law brought some Disney jack-o-lantern stencils to a family reunion that takes place in the fall. My daughter made a jack-o-lantern with Cinderella's face on it. Ever since, she will not settle for a simple face with eyes, nose and grin. She HAS to have a Disney character on hers. (Thanks, Dawn for making things so complicated!)

3. Get all the gooey, slimy, messy stuff out of the inside of the pumpkin. Or, if you hate the way it feels on your hands, make your kids do it!

4. Carve away....being careful not to cut off any appendages that belong to you or your offspring. And if you have a daughter like mine who won't settle for a simple template, have the ice pack ready for your sore fingers and strained wrist.

(Do you recognize the cat from the Disney movie, Cinderella?)

5. Light 'em up, step back and enjoy! This is especially fun if one of the native HUMONGO roaches is inside your pumpkin. There's nothing like the fragrances of toasted pumpkin and roach.

PS. Get a lot of enjoyment out of this first viewing, because the warm, humid climate will rot your pumpkin in about 2 hours!

OK, just in case, here is the disclaimer: The previous post was written tongue-in-cheek (cleverly amusing in tone; "a bantering tone"; "facetious remarks"). No part of it is meant to offend or besmirch (to detract from the honor or luster of) any person or aspect of Lower Alabama. The writer of the previous remarks loves this portion of the country and enjoys living here. She in no way seeks to discredit or sully the features of this region.


April said...

This is April's husband just letting you know that my views haven't changed about the t or t event. I just wanted some candy this year and used little P to get some. As you can see I had to carry her almost everywhere and 2 cabins had to turn on their lights. As for getting under people's skin that is a tucker family requirement. Been doing that just to defend myself against papa before I signed up for active tucker family duty.

Tonja said...

You go girl! All I ever needed to know about carving a pumpkin! Loved your 'disclaimer'.

Jenn said...

The jack o lanterns look awesome! I'm enjoying the "fall series" thus far! Happy Halloween!